I’m still mad about having diabetes

Posted byAnissaMariePosted inDiabetes Life, LifeTags:, , , , , , , ,

It has been well over a month since I was diagnosed with diabetes and I have to say..I’m quite over it. In that time I have paid closer attention to my body and what listen to what she wants me to know and I have come to the conclusion my body is pissed with me. Well, I’m not to please either.

I received my ACCU-CHEK glucose monitor a few days after my appointment from my pharmacist who gave me the quickest “this is how you use it” instructions ever. I had questions, but the line was long so I went to the best platform for information I could think of to get answers and that was Youtube. I watched several videos until it seemed the information repeated itself and I still wasn’t ready to use this damn thing.

ACCU-CHEK GUIDE Glucose monitor

I couldn’t get over that everyday I would have to take some device, willingly stick my finger with a needle multiple times a day and produce blood to test FOR MY HEALTH! Many of the videos show smiling people of all ages just happily sticking themselves and showing relief and the beep of the device. Surely if little 8 year old Sally, Granny Pearl and my momma can do it well, so can I.

I put my big girl pants and prepared myself knowing that I too would have that same quick, pain free experience I heard and read so much about. I closed my eyes and did the deed…they lied to me, it hurt. The stinging in my finger served as a reminder that I did this to myself and I will have to do this to myself everyday.

Everyday for the past 8 weeks I have woke up taken my blood pressure and monitored my sugar. I have pricked each finger multiple times a day hoping I would find that one sweet cherry spot where I don’t feel a thing… the thumbs are pretty good, but I have to increase the depth of the lancet and when I forget to change it back the deeper prick hurts bad.

Being a diabetic newbie has been nothing but trials and tribulations for me. I am learning more and more that a lot of my ailments (headaches, dizziness, feet tingling etc) were potentially the symptoms of being diabetic. I’m mad I wish I had known what this could be like before the problems started and now I may have to do this everyday for the rest of my life. I look at food now suspiciously not knowing if it will put me in the bathroom or the bed for hours. My choices are getting better and my portions smaller, but having to do research and have long discussion with myself about if I can do or eat something is exhausting.

This is how I look at all meals

Yep, I’m so over it.

If you’re a diabetic newbie, have mastered the sugar lands or you have advice for tips and tricks I would love to hear from you. I found out the hard way what too much sugar free can do to the body and it wasn’t pretty.

Until next time be safe be healthy

AnissaMarie

XOXOXO

Published by AnissaMarie

Hi, I’m T—a storyteller, a widow, and someone who believes that healing and hope can be found in the pages of a good book. Writing has always been my way of making sense of the world, but after a few detours (including brain surgery, double shifts, and life showing me its toughest side), I’ve come back to the page with more fire than ever. Widow Tales is my debut, born from late-night scribbles and quiet moments where grief met imagination. It’s a love letter to second chances, resilience, and the kind of romance that makes you laugh, cry, and maybe blush a little too. When I’m not writing, you can usually find me with a good playlist, a journal close by, and probably talking to my husky and cats like they're my manager or my editors. This space is where I’ll share pieces of my journey...writing, life, and everything in between. Pull up a chair, you’re welcome here.

Leave a comment