Why I wanted to quit but decided to keep going.

Hello, my friends! It has been a while I think it has been a bit over a month and boy I have been busy. I want to first thank everyone that has stayed with me during this short hiatus. I really do appreciate the support. I see I have new subscribers hi and welcome to my journey. September was by far the hardest month for me, I found out what I thought was a vaccine injury was actually a torn rotator cuff that I had been dealing with since May (You read that right…May). The limited mobility with my right shoulder hindered so much of what I planned to do, but now I am in physical therapy doing what I can to avoid surgery, let me tell you my shoulder and arm hurts.

To get to the heavy of it all…what happened? I won’t lie to you I was depressed, not motivated I had little will to do anything for myself. I quit or “took a break” several times during September whenever I had a bad thought, felt shitty about myself, or didn’t feel worthy of being a healthy person. I didn’t always have that get up and go to do anything, but sit, recline, and sleep. Day in and out I would try to move, eat light and fast a little longer. I always ended up snacking excessively just eating small bits and pieces of whatever was around. My loving, sweet, supportive (not) husband purchased a bag of 85 pieces of Skittles and M&M Halloween candy at the beginning of September I finished the bag in a little over a month and I know I finished it by myself. I am not proud of this and It makes me sad to know and be told constantly I ate a whole bag of candy.

As much as I felt like giving up I didn’t. I didn’t lay down and just accept a bum shoulder, snacking habit, or low motivation, I kept pushing to move my body and attempt to control some part of my eating. Every visit to the doctor or glance in the mirror kept me wanting to try and just do a little more.

I’m surprised and quite proud of myself that I smile thinking of my growth.

Here are the numbers for September.

I didn’t do too bad and I didn’t hit any major goals. I touched the 259 and was tickled pink, but as you can see I was up and down. Right now I am up 263 and have no plans to stay here.

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I would like to post better results for October and I expect to. As of today I am feeling good and taking it one step at a time with depression, low motivation, and the overall desire just to sleep…

If you have ever felt like giving up drop a comment and tell what kept you focused, or if you have any tips to stop yourself from quitting I would love to hear them.

Until next time my friends

AnissaMarie